At all levels of the universe, our most evident truth is that change is the basis upon which life, as we know it, rests. The sun rises and sets, seasons change and through this journey we experience life, death, joy and pain. And if we open ourselves up to the process, we continuously tweak the amazing tale of our life testimony.

A few weeks ago, the worlds third largest economy, Japan, suffered a series of blows starting with an earthquake, on to a tsunami and then ongoing damage from nuclear plant fallout. It was painful to watch the events unfold. The damage to the physical structure of a country and the loss of lives is always enough to make each of us take pause.

For the last five or more years, the United States has also suffered tremendous strife in the form of economic disaster. In a very different way, millions of Americans lost property, money and a sense of security. Along all levels of the socioeconomic spectrum the pain of harsh realities has been felt. It is a very real, unfortunate truth that many times it takes loss to slow us down and make the very necessary changes in order to move our lives forward.

On a personal level, we often come to crossroads in life. And, like most people I know, we resist the idea that the impending ‘shakeup’ will really make things new again. Each person develops their own comfort zones. We do this for ourselves and for our loved ones. We like a certain pace in our work lives and settle along certain patterns within our social lives. And whether it truly works well or not, we come to depend upon that structure. It goes along with the idea that the rut in the road you know is better than the one you don’t.

Many times, we secretly crave something different. Life begins to feel stagnant and stressful in a underlying type of way. We ask ourselves questions like, ‘what is this thing called happiness anyway?’ or ‘is this really all there is to life?’. Yet, we continue to allow fear to be our main compass. And that fear imprisons us in ways that blocks both our vision and creativity.

As we look out into the larger world, we see disaster and catastrophe taking different forms all the time. The scenes described above represent the evolution of life. Yet we also see incredibly wondrous feats of ‘magic’; humanity at its greatest, stories of survival and triumph and everyday saving graces. If we truly observe, on both a small and large scale, we see life transformative stories that take our breath away and help us to realize that courage does not always roar, sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day that says I will try again tomorrow.

When we deal with our own personal turmoil, the aches of uncertainty and the pains of lack of fulfillment, we must start to seek change. As we embrace that concept at its very core, we start to see possibility. And that possibility leads us to a place where creative potential unlocks and problem solving juices begin to flow. We have to remember to do the work of dealing with our emotions, sifting through our layers of fears and embracing the idea that sometimes the path will feel uncertain but that with faith, forward thinking and perseverance, we will triumph.

We sometimes hear people forgiving one another by saying: “I will forgive you, but I can never forget.” This phrase is commonly used and often seen as a valid acceptance of an apology, but is that really what it is? Isn’t there something missing from forgiveness that comes with conditions and hesitation? Shouldn’t forgiveness be unconditional and undiluted by selfish reservations of certain rights? Forgiveness is a choice, after all – not something that is forced upon us.

It shouldn’t be thrown around like a cheap rag whenever we feel like it might come in handy. Forgiveness is a serious tool and it needs to be given a chance to fulfill its purpose – purpose to repair something that is broken. It needs to be genuine and come straight from our hearts to be effective. Half-hearted and insincere forgiveness is like a saw that has no blade. We can’t fix a broken house with a tool like that. We can try, but the house will be shaky and its foundation weak.

Forgiving and never forgetting is an illogical statement where one hand shows forgiveness and the other one takes it a way. It is a testimony of insufficient understanding of forgiveness and its true purpose. Forgiveness is a vehicle of reconciliation and peace, not a tool to bolster our self-righteousness or kindness that doesn’t come from the deepest trenches of our hearts. Even if we physically cannot forget, true forgiveness doesn’t say it out loud.

Forgiveness is a beautiful thing and it should be used neither lightly nor without true intentions. It has great curative powers and an ability to heal even the most painful of wounds. But it can only do its job if we use it in accordance with its real purpose and demonstrate that we respect its great value. Forgiveness is a commitment to follow through our promise with actions that reflect that commitment. We shouldn’t grimace and talk badly behind the backs of people whose apology we have accepted with a smile on our faces. We shouldn’t betray their expectations by acting in contradiction with our promises and cause confusion about our sincerity. If we choose to forgive, we should be able to stand behind our words – or not forgive at all.

It is hard enough to ask for forgiveness and it’s even harder to accept an apology with complete honesty and genuine will to put the dark days behind us forever. It is hard because forgiveness is a powerful force and it doesn’t let its true value be harnessed without getting some proof that we understand its mission. It wants us to deliver our true words without implicit or explicit reservations before it takes our side and starts helping us.

It knows that only real and unconditional forgiveness will build a solid foundation for meaningful reconciliation and peace. It knows that the fruits of forgiveness will only be served to the ones whose promise comes straight from their hearts and shines from their honest eyes. It knows that words are just dead letters without action that breathes life to them and unleashes their powers.

The good things in life do not just come pouring in, they need to be worked on. The last thing you would want to do to make good things happen to your life is to think negatively. It is the other way around. Positive mental attitude is believing and working hard toward the best results in every difficult situation.

It doesn’t offer solutions but it helps greatly in preparing your mind to find solutions. This attitude is a learned attitude; you cannot fake it or force it. It comes naturally to people who welcome it and continuously embrace it. Here is how you can develop it; We are rational beings; we were created superior from all the other living things in the world. Therefore we have the ability to think and reason, come up with resolutions to our problems.

Picture in your mind how you want things to happen and do the things you need to do to make it happen. I don’t see any reason why you can’t succeed. If you let fear of losing rule your mind then you are bound to fail.

Be choosy when it comes to people you hang out with and with the thoughts you keep in your mind. Wouldn’t it be better if you are with happy people with happy thoughts in your mind all the time? Happiness is contagious you know.

The happy thoughts and wise disposition will not find its way to your mind if it is clouded with insecurities, anxiety and fear. Make sure your mind is free from these things so you can think clearly and with an open mind.

Incorporate regular exercise into your daily routine to get back into shape. This is proven to be really effective in releasing stress that is causing discomfort and anxieties which eventually will prevent you from thinking positively.

A positive mind foresees good health, joy, success and peace of mind. Whatever a positive mind expects happens. Be in control of your life. If you can control your attitude, so does your dispositions and eventually your life.

Letting positive attitude rule your mind will bring you utmost peace, healthy relationships, happiness and satisfaction in life. When you have this attitude it helps turn unfortunate daily events move smoothly and makes life brighter and hopeful.

Nobody said life will sail smoothly all the time, life isn’t normal if there are no trials that will rock our boat of life. Just remember that complaining will not make it better, planning will, with a positive attitude that you can do it.

Life can sometimes get on top of you and make you feel as if you have no hope and as a result you can start to feel depressed and powerless. But you may be feeling depressed but you are not powerless.

If you want to begin to feel better then first you need to just put your worries aside for a second.

I know it’s easier said than done but just trust me on this one.

Get a pen and paper and write down the things that you have in your life to be grateful for. Even if it’s as simple as running water, clothes on your back, a roof over your head, eyes to be able to read this etc, etc. Keep writing until you can’t think of anything else that you have to be grateful for. Have a think about this and think about how lucky you are to have these things.

Now take a fresh sheet of paper and write down all the things that you appreciate about yourself. What’s great about you? Are you a good friend? A great listener? Maybe you’re really good at drawing or a great cook? Be honest because if you look hard enough there is something amazing about all of us. Again keep writing until you can’t think of anymore or your arm hurts through writing whichever comes first.

Now just think about these things, who you are as a person and what you have to be grateful for and you should begin to feel a heck of a lot better. There is always a way out, you just need to believe in it. Do not beat yourself up over what you haven’t done just give yourself credit for what you have done. Don’t ponder of what you haven’t got, be grateful for what you have and I assure you, you will start to feel a whole lot better.

When you begin to feel better you will feel more motivated and like you can do more but you have to start with yourself. Do something you enjoy, put on some music you love and start to dance or a comedy. But shake off them blues because they don’t change anything they don’t help anyone least of all you.

Keep your chin up because you have plenty to be grateful for it’s just sometimes hard to see this when you are feeling down. When you start believing that you can feel better you will start feeling better.

Start with a smile, just a little one and then feel it deep inside your soul till you’re grinning like a Cheshire cat. Smiling helps shift your emotions and your mood. You deserve to feel better, the fact that you’re reading this tells me you want to. So go on, enjoy yourself do something fun.